Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe.” - Gail Devers

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

God has a plan...just wish I could see the blueprint.

So I had my first exam of the semester yesterday. Coming out of the exam room, I was confident I did well. Silly me. What people don't usually know, is that anything below a 76.5 is considered failing in this program. And while I was a great student all through high school and even college, the nursing program is kicking my butt. I suppose if I had "divorced" my family for 2 years like they suggested when I entered the program, I could do better and maybe even score an "A" (which is a 94 or better, by the way). But I refuse to do that and will have to take what I can earn with them around. So I did less than I had hoped on the exam and that now means I have to work extra hard for the next exams. And I wonder, like I did in second semester, if I chose the right path. Am I really meant to be a nurse? If I don't like it now, will I like it then? (After all, there's no guarantee I'll get a job in labor in delivery, which I know I'd love.) Have I wasted time and money? I remind myself God has a plan and I need to just leave it to Him. Will I give up? No. Will I fail? Possibly. All I can do now is try my hardest and let God do the rest.

So I'm not good at taking tests. There has to be something I am good at that will help me to feel good about myself again. Right? Maybe something that can help someone else? :) I'm good at growing babies. At least *I* think so. After all, I have brought six of the most precious babies ever into the world! Hmmmmm...

Again, God has a plan.